OF TRUMP, PROPHETS AND OPINION POLLS

It's great to be accorded another opportunity and share some thoughts on the trending local and global issues via this Blog. I still enjoy reading your positive feedbacks when I wrote back on this same platform.

Not officially verified but it is certain that one name has been widely spoken, tweeted, pasted and snarled than most over this fading week, Trump. Donald J. Trump's monolithic triumph against perhaps the most over-qualified candidate in recent years, one Hillary Rodman Clinton who was backed by both the media,  Hollywood Celebs, zombies, Pop stars,  Silicon Valley billionaires and of course even former enemy, the Bush clan. Mr Trump has reignited the feeling that an impossible mission can sometimes be a cakewalk if your trumpcards also contain  both jokers (the e-mail scandal and, just being a Killary- don't mind this one). Many Russian sponsored media outlets are salivating with the win calling it a mark of holy triumph over the evil establishment that had relegated Russian influence to a miniscule millipede. Some have even put his accidental road to the White House as resemblance of how Leicester City hoodwinked the so-called giants and eased to their first title in a century. It's a waste of time for an African, especially those of us shunted in the earthly hell of Nyasaland to start arguments on whether his win was merited or not. Our plot in the south-east of Africa (some historians still think Malawi is in Central Africa) ergo, will be affected by the events of last Tuesday in the US. Many have put it that Clinton's win was as good as delivered as was a feeling of most Golden State Warriors bandwagon fans when they took a commanding 3-1 lead in the NBA final last July. Most Malawians I know rooted for her, in a way of avenging their loss that self-exiled former presidente who failed to nail down her toes at Sanjika after being handed a life line by the sudden death of one fake Ngwazi. Well Hillary was thoroughly defeated even in previously Democrats' stronghold states. She has failed to join an ivy league of women leading big economies that include Britain's Theresa May, Berlin's Tsar Angela Merkel, and of course scandalous South Korean's Park Geun-jung. She miscalculated her chances, and Trump will go on to calculate our mediocrity and try to arrest the vice bleeding billions of Kwachas into bottomless pockets of local political cronies.

Well, in his usually trashed campaign rhetorics, Trump promised to evaluate USA's position and aid to Africa after noting that most of the green bucks were being channeled to other  eensy-weensy projects (I'm afraid if I will not forget BEAM Trust windfall from NAC). Trump said Africa need to be recolonized to remove the vice of greedy useless western educated professors with a longer than usual CV that include Karate lessons. There will come a time when having a green card will be a requirement for one to stand (we should start using to sit or walk) for president in Nyasaland. Trump is hated by Africans political Hitlers...

Well maybe not only the country rats are dreading the iron-fist rule of the grey haired fellow. The election razmatazz  also fascinated both seers, Popes, Sangomas, Prophets, Apostles and not forgetting archBishops. It's not surprising especially in Africa, where we have more Churches than there are hospitals, that religious leaders took the opportunity to cement their invincibility in as far as professing heavenly oracles is concerned. Some even challenged their toung-speaking audiences that the sun will rise from the West if their man/woman fails to stamped into the marble house in Washington DC. The name of Mbona/Yahweh/gods was used to emphasize authority over their oracles. To devastating effect, a large number of these seers have lost their reputation, if at all an iota of it was still there. In one reply to the BBC, one Ntaba speaking on behalf of his master conman in Lagos reiterated that there was a misspelling mistake over their written official prophecy, civic-educating that "it should have read Woolman not Woman... " refering to the grey hair of the winner. Fantastic. I have to say there is a thin line seperating a prophecy and a prediction which our fellow spiritual fathers and founders have exploited. Trump didn't need a prophecy to pass through a Hillary test, she was the worst candidate of the two in my opinion so much so that it would have been a mud and waterslide victory had Trump checked his mouth over many months of the battle. Officially I'm prophesying that Trump will be inaugurated on the 20th of January 2017.

And worse than prophecies were opinion polls and popularity indexes manufactured by various media outlets. We still remember the Afro-barometer which invaded the land in 2014 by producing two opinion polls in a month with varied results. Another creditable NGO hoarded everyone who could care that PPM was destined to an obvious triumph so long as the Axa bus fairs remained affordable, myopia at best. All celebrated Western Media polls gave Hillary Clinton an easy win, amd she maintained a healthy 10% exit-poll lead over the billionaire if you trust the CNN. We were meant to believe that the Republican Party had messed up big time to nominate hot bloodied Trump for a post as big as this. They have eaten their words. The media can be bought, that has always  been a fact, and Mrs Clinton was primed to a futile victory by CNN, Fox, BBC, CNB, C-Span, VOA and Dzimwe Radio in Mangochi. Its a lesson for our own half baked broadcasters to mantain integrity and not check popularity index at a mental institution.

Enjoy the weekend folks.